The Beginnings...

                When my group first entered the apartment of the refugee family that we are working with, we were overwhelmed by the smells of spices in their cooking, reminding us immediately of the differences between our cultures. That first night, a woman who works for World Relief was there to help my group get started. She showed us flashcards and books that would be useful in teaching the family to speak English. We helped her go through a large amount of vocabulary and math flashcards. We also helped the family identify objects around the room and in books. A great deal of time was spend learning each other’s names. During our next two visits to the family’s home, we did much of the same. We have spent a lot of time on basic vocabulary and are now trying to teach more conversational phrases. Each time we go, we also try to do something fun with the family. We have taught them “Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes,” made bracelets with them, and taught them how to play tic-tac-toe. During these fun activities, we try to engage each member of the family in a conversation as another way to improve their speaking skills in English. The entire time we are with the family is spent in a constant effort to communicate interculturally.

                Each time we visit the family, I remind myself that interaction posture is key when interacting with the family. I find it very important to the learning process that I respond to the family’s questions in a nonjudgmental way. This can sometimes be challenging because the questions are often so basic that I cannot imagine someone not knowing the answer. It also becomes difficult to respond their questions a manner that does not seem condescending or judgmental because of the language barrier that exists. I have discovered that it is a delicate balance. It is necessary to use words and gestures that are simple enough for them to understand, but using language that is too simple comes off as offensive and condescending. With each visit, my ability to find and maintain this balance is slowly improving.

                In addition, I see uncertainty and anxiety, in both the family and my group, each visit. The uncertainty we all have stems from a lack of knowledge of each other’s cultures, especially the language aspect. This lack of knowledge prevents all of us from being able to interpret the meanings of each other’s words and actions. The anxiety, though slowly lessening, is easy to sense. Each of us feels some sort emotional stress as a result of this uncertainty. To reduce this anxiety, I have mostly engaged in passive strategies by observing their behavior.

                From these visits, I have learned that my skills when it comes to intercultural communication need some improvement. To become a more competent communicator, I need to work on sending messages that are based on descriptions rather than my own judgments, assumptions, and evaluations. I also need to continue to work on balancing the simplicity of language with the display of respect and equality so that I do not make myself seem superior to the family. Though the uncertainty and anxiety we all feel is normal, I do not think that I have engaged in the most effective ways of reducing it. In our next visits, I will engage in active and interactive ways of reducing the uncertainty and anxiety by learning more about their culture on my own and by directly asking them about different aspects of their culture. Doing these things will be extremely beneficial in our future interactions.